The Insecured Wife

Many wives battle issues of insecurities on regular basis that bother on looks, confidence and self image. Insecurities about the physical appearance often times affect intimacy in marriage when the woman holds back her body when she becomes concerned about how her husband's perception of her body especially with the after effect of child birth; the breast loosing its firmness; sagging skin; fats deposits and many other marks that remind her she's not getting younger. The thought of whether her husband is irritated by her looks fills her head that any non-related negative response from him will automatically justify her fears. When a woman has a negative view of her image so much so that she is overwhelmed by it, she becomes discontented. Doubt sets in and her imagination creates reasons for her to worry about.  

In case you are at this point, can you take a break and ask yourself, does God intend these feelings for me in marriage? Am I being controlled by my emotions, fears and insecurities or by God's word?  What does God's word have to say about me? Ps 139:14 say, "I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made, marvellous are Your works; and that my soul knows very well."  Are you living a life of praise or pity? When you cease to praise God your life becomes a plight. You find yourself in a pity party over your looks. Do you believe you're a product of God's marvellous works or a product of beauty products, regimen, diet and workout?  Our insecurities bring nothing but fear and causes us to wander away from the truth about our being fearfully and wonderfully made.  

Don't allow your insecurities and self doubt impact negatively on your marriage bed. Release your body to your husband, don't give an opening to the devil into your marriage. Believe God's word that says your husband will be intoxicated by your love for ever. Dismiss the negative thoughts, fears and feelings. Dismiss the suspicion. Dismiss every insecurity caused by your physical appearance and embrace what God's word says about you. Become a confident woman not because you have the world's statistics of a model with the perfect figure, but because you have the bible's statistics of a woman who is not just beautiful but also full of grace and praise worthy.  

tis is not saying we are not to care for our looks since our men are visuals. This is only encouraging you to guide against  making self image an idol. To take heed so your view point of yourself does not hinder your marital relationship. To guide against comparing yourself with someone else and to understand your body and care for it in that understanding. You may not be able to come down to a size 10, don't beat yourself over that; just ensure you eat healthy and live healthy.  

Know what makes you comfortable under your skin and go for it. Rock your size and your figure. If you're not confident in yourself, no one will make you confident. We all don't have to be slim to look attractive. You're beautiful and wonderful no matter your size. With this renewed confidence, your husband can be blessed by your fountain and also find complete satisfaction in body. Prov. 5:18-19.